THE BIRTH OF A NEW YEAR

Each year most people all over the world look forward to celebrate the end and, of course, the beginning of a new year with good health and great fun. To many, it represents a moment of celebration involving heavy eating and drinking. Some say it is just a new day with a change in secular calendar. Others consider it a time to evaluate their progress in life, viz a viz, their expectations. Irrespective of beliefs,one thing stands out;

an increase in ones age must occur in each year. The expectations of many lead to a resolution, a firm decision taking to do or not to do something, popularly called NEW YEAR RESOLUTION.

In view of this, I see expectations and faith as friends of a new year. Why? It is because everyone expects something, no matter the state, and for those who are religiously minded faith in their God may result in the realisation of their expectations. Expectations towards New Year differ and ranges from very high to very low or nothing. This is due largely to the differences in individuals’ physical, economic and spiritual state. For those that consider themselves optimist, a positive blood of expectation runs through their system. It starts from the first day, sometimes does not stop until the very last moment of the year. This is in contrast to the pessimist as their year is run and managed by uncertainty,fear, discouragement and complaint.As for Resolution, irrespective of the time made,it serves as a friend of change when making it and as judge of commitments when evaluating implementation.

However, as the year continues its journey of chapters wrapped in days, weeks and months, situations may change. The unexpected becomes the ruler of life for some individuals, organisations and even nations. Risk taking, beliefs, pragmatism, passion and tenacity become active part of life for those determine to succeed. At this time it could be felt that a New Year resolution is often easy to make but difficult to keep. Since change is inevitable in life, there will always be various expectations for the leaders and the led, employers and employees, parents and children, sellers and buyers. I believe resolution is a decision and thus should be planned and executed effectively.

I am an optimist, I believe in God and I have expectations. My expectations vary each year but I resolve to live my life to please my God, Jehovah, every year. I shall seek his counsel in matters and think reasonable before acting. As regard work, I shall be industrious, invest in business that benefit humanity, uphold good moral standard and save. Amid unforeseen contingencies, I shall support my brothers and sister financially and morally when it is within my powers to do so.As for you,what do you make of each day you live and what have you decided to achieve?Remember,you cannot see the picture when you are in the frame!Life has so many distraction. It is better to be yourself than be others.Be positive and expect positive change with Action,Belief and Consistency.The control of the mind is essencial because you cannot be different from your thought.

I SEE HOPE IN THE EYES OF DREAMS

It is another day, a day full of surprises. No one knows what exactly it will bring but I can only expect the best to happen. It is a time when expectations are, not to say the least, high.For some, The heart is full of what ought and should be done but reality is full of uncertainty, mistakes, poor wages and rash decisions. In the island of determination, hope is an essential food of life that should be consumed reasonable.

When dreams drive you to set goals, goals become your mirror of self examination.Hope represent your strenght to hold on.Without hope it is impossible to achieve enthusiastic confidence, the energy to achieve greatness. To make a dream come true, one needs to work with realistic tools, determination and courage.

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INJECT HAPPINESS INTO YOUR RELATIONSHIP

After a heartfelt discussion with a friend about what I personally consider a dark cloud in her relationship,I was compel to look at the entire idea of having a relationship.Moreover,what is the main essence of having a relationship between  a man and a woman when happiness is not attached?Let me state that "relationship",as used in this article,refers to emotional connection between people.My focus is on the relationship between a man and a woman,especially during courtship or dating.

John Wesley once said, "do all the good you can,by all the means you can,in all the ways you can,at all the time you can..." This will best suit the actions of anyone who intend to get the best out of a relationship. It is not just what you say but also what you do.You have your part to play and so does your partner.It will be important to stress that my intention in this topic is not to play God or "Mr perfection" but to express my view as much as I can based on what I have experienced,read,learned from people and most importantly my belief.

Sometimes in life,you get to a level where you find that special one you feel means a whole lot to you.At that point you may find it difficult to express,in word, how you feel emotionally.The early part of most relationships looks  charming.You are never bored or upset when together and as such anything he/she says or does is just great.You may think you have found the most wonderful,understanding,attractive and considerate person ever.

Nevertheless,as the relationship opens its chapters of realities and challenges,that new shine you felt  when you first met begins to wear off.You feel secured or insecure depending on the knowledge you have of your partner.Your behaviour is an expression of your secured or unsecured feelings.When you are no longer worrying about impressing him/her,you are secured.However,when you start doubting,not ready to accept anything about each other without verification,it is a reflection of your insecure state.

This is normal because relationships take time and work to grow. As you get to know each other better,you relax and stop trying to be on your best behaviour anytime you are together.When a relationship is growing,you start noticing some strange attitude/habits in each other personality.You discover it is not everything your partner says  or does is funny,meaningful or impressive.The "real you" appears.It may take  mere weeks,months or years to arrive at this emotional state of reality.And when it comes,there is no pretence.It is either you are happy in the relationship or you are not,similar feeling rules your partner.

Happiness is vital in any true relationship.You,as well as your partner,deserve to be happy.Humans vary. what brings happiness to a man,in a relationship,may not be the same as that of the woman.In the words of Charles Caleb Colton,"Our minds are as different as our faces:we all want to travel to one destination;--Happiness;but we're not all going by the same road".

Material wealth contributes to happiness but it is not the defining factor of true happiness.The defining factor is contentedness.No wonder James Hurdis advise that,"To be secure,be humble.to be happy,be content".I defined true happiness as a state of mind coated with contentedness.When happiness is in a relationship,it shows the relationship is healthy.When a relationship is healthy,it means:

• You enjoy each other's company and laugh when together
• You respect each other
• You share ideas and feelings openly
• You feel safe and supported as a partner
• You provide safety  and support as a partner
• You do not always find errors in each other               

A healthy relationship is not selfish,both partners feel it,and it gives it the best chance to grow.This is a precise definition of love in a relationship.

When all these and many other positive traits are not in your relationship,do not give up yet.You can both make it work if you really want to.To do this,you have to believe you can do it and work towards improvement.Everything begins with you.You cannot change the whole world but you can change you.Are you prepared to make the needed changes just to make your relationship work and attain a healthy status?If your answer is yes,then these six tips to a happy relationship will help you to succeed.

(1)You have to be honest and trust worthy.

It takes time to trust someone and honesty brings trust.If you want your partner to be honest with you,you have to demonstrate in both words and deed that you are honest and trust worthy.A good relationship should be built on true friendship.True friendship,on the other hand,is a product of love and honesty.

(2)Keep communication line open and sound
Talk regularly about what is happening in your life and how you feel about it.sharing opinions and feelings helps, you build a greater understanding of your partner's likes,dislikes,values and goals.This,in turn,will help you speak your thought and listen to that of your partner's.

(3)Give attention and focus to your partner
When you are with your partner,be there in mind and body.You can do this by dedicating your focus to the moment you are having and try to get the best out of it,no matter how boring.


(4)Share your belief together
"Sharing is loving".We are informed by Norma Mac Ewan that,"Happiness is not so much in  having as  sharing.We make a living by what we get,but we make a life by what we give". A shared life philosophy and faith can help you build a connection of something greater.

(5)Accept each other's differences
Everyone has,at least,one area of life that he/she is not pleased with.Often times,you find partners with different family background,childhood experiences,desires,ideas and opinions.At times,because of humans' imperfection,accepting each other's opinions becomes difficult.this is where tolerance is needed.it is nice to discuss differences calmly.As mentioned earlier,learn to respect each other.If you want your opinion and choices respected,learn to respect the opinions and choices of others.

(6) Respect each other's freedom
We live in a world where rights of individuals are increasingly valued.Everybody wants freedom. One man's freedom is limited by the freedom of others.Having this in mind,give each other the freedom to spend time,when necessary,with family and friends from time to time.Everything should be built on trust.Time spent with others helps expand your interest and gives you something new to share amongst yourselves when you are together.

Finally,get the spark that brought you together back,if it is within your capacity to do.Often times,a relationship becomes boring and without new positive nor interesting things happening.Everything done at a point seems to be annoying and a repetition of what has been done before with no romance left.One way to get things back is to indulge in something creative together.Above all,you need to change from being a flaw finder to a strength finder.In that way,you will see your partner in a completely positive new light that creates inner satisfaction.That inner satisfaction will inject the much needed happiness in your relationship.Yes,everything starts from you!You can do it because it is possible. 




   

                         

REJECT FEAR AS A SOLUTION TO OBSTACLE

Take a moment out of your time and think about what you wish to achieve months or years back and compare it with the position you are now.what do you find?Is there any obvious difference between your present state and what you hope to achieve?If yes,then it opens the way to another question;is it positive or negative?if it is positive then you need to maintain and/or build on it.But if it is negative, why?

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